17 year old, Male, FL

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
My mom is an alcoholic and I just want her to stop. Our relationship is terrible, and I don;t know what to do. My step dad is the same, and won’t say anything to her.

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi, I’m so glad that you contacted us here at TEEN LINE. It sounds like you’re feeling anxious about your mom’s drinking, as well as your relationship with her. It is never easy to deal with a parent who is also an alcoholic, because their drinking affects their relationship with you, and as a result affects you directly. It is even harder to deal with it alone. I am wondering if you have a trusted adult you could talk to about your situation, such as a relative, teacher, or school counselor. Sometimes talking to a third-party can help you gain insight on your situation, as well as weigh whatever options you have. I also want to give you the number to Alateen, a twelve-step program designed for relatives and friends of alcoholics. Their number is (757) 563-1600, and their website is http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/. It might benefit you to look into local meetings. If you want to talk to us some more, TEEN LINE is open seven days a week from six to ten PM PST. Our number is (310) 855-4673. We are here to listen.

a TEEN LINE listener

16 year old, Female, OH

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
Hey Teen Line, I had a few guys i kinda knew die in a car crash back on October 3, 2010. Since then I’ve been so sad I can’t even do anything without thinking about them. I talked to their dad before Christmas and it was so sad to see him again. How do I get over this or even put it back in my mind that only a few things make me remember them

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi, thanks for reaching out to us at TEEN LINE. I’m so sorry for your loss. I want you to know that it’s really difficult to get over the death of a friend or loved one, and it is normal for you to be feeling sad right now. There are many stages of grief that we pass through until we come to acceptance of the loss. Often times we see somebody that triggers the memory of that person, and all the sad feelings come back to us, and it is really hard. It can often be helpful to talk to someone you trust about your feelings and write in a journal as a constructive way to express these emotions. If you want to talk to someone about your feelings, we at TEEN LINE, are available at (310) 855-4673 between the hours of 6-10 PM PST to support you. a TEEN LINE teen.

a TEEN LINE listener

15 year old, Female, CA

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
I have a friend she been one of my closest friends since middle school we went to different high schools after we graduated a few weeks after we started school she would cal me saying that she felt like no one cared how it would be better if she were dead i would listen to her so she would have someone to talk to eventually it got so bad i told her she should talk to her mom or a teacher i even suggested teenline but she wont talk to anyone but me shes one of my closest friends and i dont want her to hurt herself but i dont know what to do

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hey, thank you so much for contacting TEEN LINE. It sounds like you’re friend is in a really dangerous spot right now, and it’s great that you’re so actively seeking out help for her. She’s lucky to have you as a friend and as someone who can support her through a tough time. If she doesn’t want to talk to the sources you mentioned, she might want to consider calling the Suicide Prevention Hotline, and their number is 877-727-4747. Also, she could be struggling with depression, and if so, another option is a school counselor, or a therapist. If she’s still adamant about not talking to someone, you could think about talking to her mom by yourself. If you’re friend is in danger, it’s important that she get help, and even though she might think that her trust was betrayed, the most important thing is keeping her safe. If you want to talk more about this, you can call us at TEEN LINE from 6-10 pm at 800-852-8336.

a TEEN LINE listener

16 year old, Female, US

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
Hi my names J___, on november 26 I was sexually assaulted by one of me dear friends, someone who I loved seeing everyday, and someone who I was my reason to look forward to school. I had feelings for him. And ge betrayed me. I reported what happened but about 3 days ago I got my last call from the police that they won’t press charges because when he was question he seemed remorseful. But I never once got an apologyfrom him. His family doesn’t even know what he did. And I have to see him everyday. I just don’t know what to do. I have no closure known that I get to suffer while he gets to go on in peace. I dont feel like me anymore. And I’m afraid of men now. I can’t go in public by mysel anymore because it’s too much for me. I just need help I guess.

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi,
I’m glad you contacted us here at TEEN LINE. From what you’ve shared with us here it sounds like you feel betrayed by someone who you care about, and trusted, which is a very awful thing, and im so sorry that you were hurt like that. I can imagine that you are frustrated by the lack of concern by the police about what he did to you, as well as his lack of remorse. Along with these feelings, it must be very hard having to see him every day. At this point it is really important that you talk to somebody who can help you sort out how you are feeling and can help you choose what steps to take next. A good place to start is with someone like a counselor, teacher, parent, or therapist, perhaps someone who is trained, and can help guide you toward healing. Here is a number to a great organization called RAINN 800-656-4673. They are there to help victims of sexual assault and can be a great resource for you. You can also call TEEN LINE between the hours of 6pm and 10pm pst, our number is (310)-855-4673, if you would like to talk more.

a TEEN LINE listener

13 year old, Female, NV

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
My mom has been drinking ALOT. I hate it when she does. She spends all of the family money on it. Shes always drunk. SHe leaves for 6 hours at a time at night. She smells like vodka HORRIBLY. I have to hold my breath around her. She wont stop. None of our family will come over because they dont want her to drink so i never get to see brothers or sisters or nieces… I am embarrassed when friends come over because she smells up the whole house and acts insane… I am so done with it and I dont know what to do…

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi,
Thanks for contacting TEEN LINE. It sounds like you’re very frustrated with your mother. An alcoholic’s lifestyle effects them and the people around them tremendously, and from your email, it seems that you have definitely been exposed to some negatives of your mother’s dependence. Have you discussed her behavior with another family member? Maybe with open communication your family can work on getting your mother help. Your mom’s alcoholism is not a shameful topic, in fact many kids have parents that struggle with it. They even have programs dedicated to teens in your situation. Alateen is a mutual support group for teens who know alcoholics, and they have locations all around the nation. Here’s the website http://www.nevadaal-anon.org/alateenhome.html where you can get information and find a meeting near you. I also encourage you to call us at TEEN LINE to talk. Our number is 310-855-4673, and we are open every day from 6-10pm PST. I hope you know that no matter what you are not alone.

a TEEN LINE listener

17 year old, Female, IN

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
Here I am, dealing with similar issues that I first approached you guys about. My cutting issue has increased. It seems that every little thing that upsets me sparks the need to cut or even sparks the suicidal thoughts. My ex-boyfriend told me today that I would never make it through college, that I would never get accepted all because I told him I planned on leaving our city for college. His talking down to me constantly reminds me of the emotional abuse I suffered from my step-father when I was younger. Those words will never leave my mind. And my parents feel that I won’t succeed as well, telling me that they expect me back in their house within two hours of leaving because I won’t make it out in the real world. Their words hurt. It tears down my self-esteem. It makes me feel like I have no reason to even attempt to try. I just.. I want to end the pain and the cutting seems to be my answer. Sometimes, I just want to take it to the next level..

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi,
Thank you so much for reaching out to use here at TEEN LINE! It takes a lot of courage to reach out and ask for help. I am really worried about you and sad to hear that your cutting has increased. It sounds like you are being put under a lot of pressure by people like your ex-boyfriend and your parents to succeed in the “real world”. It is understandable that the constant put downs from your ex and your parents would be harming your self-esteem. It is evident that you are in a lot of pain and are looking for a way to relieve it. I am wondering if you have ever had the urge to cut and not gone through with it…if so, what helped you to not cut? Was there something that you did that helped you? Some other coping skills you might find useful when you want to cut are ripping paper, going for a walk/run, talking to a friend, screaming into a pillow, holding an ice cube until it melts, playing a musical instrument, or playing with a pet. A good website for you to visit might be www.self-injury.net which provides support to those who self-injure. There are a variety of resources on the site, including blogs where you can talk to others who can relate to what you are going through. You also mentioned that you have had suicidal thoughts and at the end of your e-mail you said sometimes you want to just take it to the “next level”. I am really concerned about your safety and I want you to know that although things may seem really hopeless and overwhelming right now, they CAN get better. I think it would be really good for you to call the Suicide Prevention Hotline, which is open 24 hours a day, at (877) 727-4747. You can also always call TEEN LINE from 6-10pm (PST) at (310) 855-4673 and talk to one of our teens. We would love to hear from you! You can also live chat with one of our teens during the same hours at www.teenlineonline.org.

a TEEN LINE listener

16 year old, Female, CA

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
my dad died last ear, y mom is stressed about about work and shes divorcing my step-dad. i take care of my little brothers almost everyday, all i ever hear in my house is yelling and fighting. my mom and i have a really bad relationship, so i have nooone to talk to now that my daddy is gone, i feel like im no good and sometimes i think of killing myself, maybe that would be the best solution out of this.

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi thank you for contacting us at TEEN LINE. I imagine that it must have been really difficult to deal with your Dad’s death, and overwhelming to live with the fighting that has been going on between your mom and your step dad. It sounds like you don’t have anyone that you feel comfortable talking to, which can feel very lonely and isolating. Also, with so much going on, it sounds like you’ve had to take on a big responsibility with your brothers, which can lead to a lot of stress. Finding someone to talk to, whether it be a relative, a close friend, a trusted adult, or a school counselor, could be really helpful in getting a support system, and in allowing you to find a way in releasing your stress. It could also be really helpful to focus more on other things in your life, whether it be school, or some type of activity or hobby that you enjoy. You said that you’ve had thoughts of killing yourself, but I want to let you know that although you are going through a really tough time, there are other people that can help, and give you the type of support that you need to get through this. If you ever do have suicidal thoughts, please call the suicide prevention hot line, which is open 24 hours a day, and whose number is 877-727-4747. I strongly encourage you to call or chat with us at TEEN LINE too. Our number is 1-800-852-8336, and we are open every day from 6-10 PM PST.

a TEEN LINE listener

14 year old Male

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
parents keep fighting and talking about divorce

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hi. Thanks for contacting TEEN LINE. It sounds like you have been going through a lot lately, and your parent’s fighting and talk of divorce has really taken its emotional toll. It must be really confusing and difficult to have to deal with something like this. I’m wondering if you have talked to anyone about what has been going on – a close friend, or trusted adult maybe? Sometimes, having another person to talk with can make a situation a little easier to deal with and process. Also, if you ever want to talk to another TEEN, you can always call us here at TEEN LINE at 310-855-4673. We are open every night from 6-10 PM PST.

a TEEN LINE listener

15 year old, Female, SC

TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
hey, i totally suck at talking about my feelings and asking for help… any pointers???

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hey,
Thanks for contacting TEEN LINE. It is ok to have trouble talking about your feelings. A lot of people do. Sometimes it is easiest to express your feelings to someone you are really close to, like a good friend or family member. Also writing in a journal or doing some type of art can be a good way to express yourself. If you want you can always call or chat online with us here at TEEN LINE. We are open every night from 6-10 PM PST and our number is (310) 855-4673.

a TEEN LINE listener