TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
I am so messed up, you have know idea. I'm so depressed, I hate my life so much. I cry every single day, I just want to kill myself and get it over with. I go to counciling but its not helping at all, but I tell my mom it is because I don't want to dissapoint her. She expects so much from me, and I don't think I can live up to her expectations. I've been cutting for 2 years now and can't stop. I love to draw but whenever I do I only draw depressing drawings which makes me even more depressed. I don't know what to do anymore, my life isn't worth living anymore,help!!!

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hey,

Thanks for emailing TEEN LINE. It sounds like you've been going through a lot for the past two years.

I'm wondering: where does this stem from? You said you've been cutting for the past two years...Is there a certain incident that made you start? Have you attempted to kill yourself? You also mentioned seeing a counselor; how long have you been seeing him/her? Are you taking any medication for depression? As you probably know, cutting can be really, really dangerous. Does your counselor or mom know that you cut?

It also seems like your mom is concerned; what does she expect from you? What makes you think she has such high standards set for you? I really really encourage you to tell your mom that counseling is not working for you. Counselors have different "styles" of counseling, and it may be that your counselor is not a good "fit" for you. If you tell your mom, she could help you find a better counselor for you.

You mentioned your passion for drawing, and how you only draw "depressing drawings". In some ways, this could be good because drawing/art is a healthy way to let out your emotions. I really suggest that you call TEEN LINE or a suicide hotline to get more help because it seems like going to see a counselor alone is not enough.

I really encourage you to call our hotline. It is available from 6 PM to 10 PM (PCT) every night. You can call us collect (for free) at 310-855-4673. TEEN LINE is available to help you out, or if you just need someone to talk to. I also recommend calling a suicide hot line for some help.. The Suicide Prevention Hotline's number is 877-727-4727. This hotline can give you helpful information, other referrals, and suicide prevention counseling. You can also go to kidshealth.org. They have a section about cutting. Or selfinjury.com.

I really hope you feel better and I hope you feel your life is worth living.

Yours,
TEEN LINE