TEEN QUESTION/PROBLEM:
My step dad keeps swearing and shouting at me and my younger brother. and he argues with my mum all the time and whenever we start crying when he shouts at us he goes 'shut the f*** up' I cant bare it anymore. but my mum doesnt want him to leave cuz she and him have had a baby. and im so annoyed cuz he picks on my youger bro loads whos really sensitive and he calls him a git and an arse and stuff. but he doesnt do it so much to me cause i stand up for myself. but he does it all for no reason and he always tells us to F off for no reason.

And i know this is stupid but i went on holiday last year and this guy sexually abused me. Well my mum and my step dad want to go to the same place again and i would love to tell them that im a bit uncomfortable about going but im scared of what my step dad will say...yeah... I'm sorry if im not meant to be emailing you about this or its the wrong thing or whatever - i just dont know where else to go... thanks

TEEN LINE WROTE:
Hello, I'm really glad that you have decided to contact us. It seems like you are going through a lot of distressful events, and you sound frustrated and exhausted by it. It is understandable that you are somewhat confused and unsure of how you should feel, especially since your family is involved in it. It is not your fault, and you should not blame yourself for being the reason of your step dad's behaviour. Have you considered that what your step dad is doing to your family is emotional abuse?(=constant insulting, screaming, threatening, blaming, putting down etc.) He is an adult while you are still a minor, and there is nothing that can excuse this. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! Have you told anyone else about what is going on at home? Talking with others, like a relative you could trust, a counselor, a friend might really help. Talking could help you relieve your feelings and hopefully form a support group that can help you and be there for you. I also have some referrals to places that can help you. There is a National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children. it is a national organization in England, Wales and Northern I reland devoted to child abuse. You can call it at 800-800-500. Maybe you could go see a counselor, therapist for family counseling/therapy. You would be able to have a counseling session as a group with your family, and having a counselor in between might help you and your family understand each other more and resolve this situation.

I'm really worried about you and wonder how you are coping with all this. It sounds very burdensome to have this experience all kept in you and very tiring. Have you talked to anyone else about what happened last holiday? Anyone that you could trust? Being a victim of sexual abuse was not your fault, you did not do anything to cause it and you don;t need to feel shameful and obliged to keep it a secret. I am glad that you considered the possibility of telling your family that you are uncomfortable with this trip.There is a palce called Women's Aid which helps with women and children with sexual abuse. It is also a UK organization. You can call this place at 0808-2000-247 or see the website at www.womensaid.org.uk

Again, I am really glad that you have decided to contact us and hope we were helpful to you. If you would like to talk more about this, or just express your feelings feel free to call TEEN LINE at 310- 855-4673. We are open everyday from 6pm to 10pm PST.You can also call the national child abuse hotline (800-422-4453), open 24 hrs daily. I am not sure if you are living in the US or UK right now?! If you need some other referrals please call us here at TEEN LINE!

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