numbing my (horror) past :'(

[hurting-one]

when i was 6 my birth dad and uncle both started abuseing/rapeing me they where bipolar abusive pot smokeing agressive drunks, my mom was too busy being a drug/sex addicted street worker my horror went on till i was 12, then moved in with a foster family where within a year (i am 13 now) i was getting abused by one of my foster brothers which didnt end till last summer when i was 18 turning 19, i'm 19 now live in canada, and i find myself slowly becomeing my dad, drinking to hide the pain, getting upset due to drinking then drinking to hide my pain. i haven leted myself cry for 13 years cause it's not right to cry, it's weakness!! please help me i need help to stop numbing my past please please

[777amanda]

I'm very sorry about your tragic past. However, it is important to remember that life does go on. Rather than being upset about your past, I suggest doing the things you've always wanted to do. Drinking only numbs the pain for a short a while. Ultimately it will hurt you permanently if you continue. I have been to a few AA meetings (alcoholics anonymous) they may be great help to you. http://www.aa.org/?Media=PlayFlash Here is a link to the alcoholics anonymous, you should find a meeting that will be held in your area. Again, i'm very sorry about your childhood.

Good luck!
Amanda

[hurting-one]

hey Amanda, i dono about aa mettings i feel like i'm doing ok i'm fine its just the flash backs,nightmares and memories are messing me up, drinking is keeping me from going insane..amanda, my names amanda too.