my sanity

[jr101]

Well I been ok trying to.resisit it but I can help it I snapped my mind finally broke me here: I was sleeping.a pain struck my heart...then.over n over I see myself stealing my dads bike n driving into traffic onpurpose trying to get hit then I do I see my self lying then n the car swerved to side...me breathing on the floor blurred out then I can hear the sound of the firedighters comingthen.I open my eyes hearing my self say do it do it...I got up I was about to go to garage but no I couldn't I broke down crying trying to cut myself instead wanting it to.stop but instead I kept saying words I didn't understand then.I finally said am.insane am insane!! My head is saying am alone am alone my heart starting to say am alone but how when I know am.not so I claw my skin stop stop stop this is not me this not me then I felt my heart saying am.being lied to don't do it...then I finally cryed...whispering am insane...no one need me this way no one will care of I continue b this way so tonight....I might finally break my promise n cut myself.

[althera]

Hey, if you need someone to talk to, pm me